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Friday, May 12, 2006

From Friendster to Pornography

I have joined a big website to look for new friends or to keep in touch with old friends since December 2004. The website is I joined it coz a good virtual friend invited me at join her network. She lives in Indonesia too but not at the same city where I live.

Hoping that I will be able to locate or to be located by my old friends, I filled out the profile completely, including some pictures of mine there.

I knew blog world for the first time also at this website, around a year ago, March 2005.
I indeed get some new friends from this site. Some old friends or some ex-students of mine located me here too.

However, one thing very humiliating from this site is, recently I sometimes got nasty messages, such as saying, “Hello pretty … have a date with me, will ya?” or “Hello pretty, wow … you are very sexy. Will you give me time to make you cum?” or “Hello pretty, need a younger guy to make you always look young? Let’s have a hot date. I will not disappoint you. Guaranteed.”

It is very humiliating, annoying, and abusing, isn’t it?

Again, I believe that it is all caused by men’s way of thinking to underestimate women only as sexual objects. I believe those guys don’t read what I wrote in my profile carefully. Or, oh, perhaps they don’t understand English coz I write it in English. J

In the middle of the poignant arguments about pornography bill in Indonesia, those who are pro to this bill say that it will reduce the number of sexual harassment, or rape when women cover their body all over so that men don’t have a chance to think about sex when seeing a woman (coz they believe that men are always opt to think of sex very easily, moreover if a woman “triggers” those men by wearing quite open clothes); while those who are contra to this bill say that it will NOT reduce the number of sexual harassment and rape when men still underestimate women, internet is still considered to be a disguise place for those with nasty thought. If this bill is really legalized to be law later, how can the government limit people to access pornography in the internet? Right now, in Indonesia more people always connote internet and its internet café as pornography thing, as the “safe” place to get nasty pictures or video, or as the “safe” place to look for dates, although some time ago there was a raid done by police to some internet cafes to “catch those people opening some porn sites in the act.” Some people who were not lucky to get caught had to pay some fine, although I don’t know where the money went after that. Will it guarantee that those people will not do that anymore?

This humiliation thing will not stop if men still stick to their “inherited” view about the inequality position between men and women—that women are enjoyable sexual objects and men do that coz they are superior.

Going back to friendster, I believe the founder of this website didn’t mean to make a certain group of people to humiliate another group of people. People who misuse it are the one who ruin it, especially in Indonesia.

What a sad thing it is. :(

PT56 12.08 120506


jiwakitamerdeka said...

Sorry to say that sexual problems is a REALITY now and ever. That is why we cannot implement our own thinking but we have to just implement that Allah has given us via Rasullullah s.a.w. as Allah knows what we know but little.
We have to inculcate in ourselves and others the fear of Allah, wear decent dressing in public and implement the law of hudud with respect to illegal sexual acts (zina).
Then men wherever they are, will RESPECT women.
No more such things as women are just men's sexual objects like now.
We have to least among ourselves. Why not?

A Feminist Blog said...

As I have said in some posts of mine in this blog, the main problem of this sexual abuse is in the men's head, who see women as sexual objects. I'v proven it myself that women who wear jilbab, cover most parts of their bodies still get some harassment from irresponsible men.
I know this problem is really difficult to solve; it is really difficult to change men's way of thinking that women are not sexual objects, This male-dominated society has taught those men like that for many centuries! It needs many centuries too to change that low way of thinking.