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Thursday, April 05, 2007

Pregnancy Outside Wedlock

Pregnancy out of wedlock will influence children’s delinquent emotion?

One article in the local newspaper stated that environment will shape people’s personality. A child who grows up in a loving, caring family will grow up to be loving and caring too; while a child who grows up in a family where the family members are hostile to one another will grow up to be a similar person too. I do agree with this. However, when the writer stated that a child born out of wedlock will eventually get defect in their personality, it is not that easy to draw a conclusion like that. We have to find out what shapes a child/a person to be unloving and delinquent.

Why do people – especially in Indonesia – tend to say that children born out of wedlock will get trouble in their emotion? It is mostly because of the consensus that women who get pregnant before they legally get married are bitch, no matter what causes a woman to get pregnant, be it

 as the result of the innocence of a young girl who does not know about having sex will make her pregnant – due to lack of sexual education,
 or as the result of the oppression done by their boyfriend to “show her true love by having sex”
 or as the result of the innocent couple not knowing what they are doing
 or even as the result of rape

This societal oppression to women who get pregnant out of wedlock will influence the emotion of the mother-to-be, will hurt her feeling as the accusation from society as a “girl who cannot keep her self-value” by doing “forbidden thing”. This oppression will make her reject her baby so that she will hate the baby. Moreover if she does not get moral support from the family; or even the family will consider her as a disgrace too; the result will be worse.

This all comes from hypocritical society that considers sex as a filthy thing to do for those who are not married yet. Giving a proper sexual education is considered a taboo thing.

When a woman gets pregnant out of wedlock – moreover if it is her own choice because having a baby is everybody’s right, not getting involved in a marriage is everybody’s right too – and she realizes the responsibility – such as welcoming and loving her baby-to-be, we do not need to feel worried that she will produce a baby that will get trouble in the moral and spiritual emotion.

I dream of seeing society that has humanity to one another, will support one another, to create more humane next generations.

PT56 11.40 050407

1 comment:

geekgirl said...

hello mbak, have you watched "saved" (produced in 2004), a movie starred by mandy moore? it's in usa, but such condition exists there, too. it really portrays the condition, just with different religious frame: christianity (while in indonesia mostly under islam).