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| Samantha and Siddharta |
In the
DROUGHT, episode 11 from season 1 Sex and the City, Carrie said that New York
is about sex; people getting it, people trying to get it, and people who can't
get it. In this episode, each main character has their own sex problems: (1)
Carrie stopped having sex with her 'perfect' boyfriend after she accidentally
farted in front of Big. (and the trigger she farted was that she felt too
comfortable in their relationship!) (2) when Carrie didn't have sex with Big
for 3 days in a row, Miranda didn't have sex at all for three months. This
seemingly trivial problem made them quarrel a bit. Farting was something human so
it was okay for Carrie to fart; this is Miranda's opinion. On the other hand,
Carrie considered it a big problem because after she farted, Big seemed to lose
his interest to have sex with Carrie.
"Not
doing it when you are with someone means much more than not doing it when you
are not with someone."
Then two of
them continued talking about it, till Carrie asked, "is it normal to be in
the same bed and not do it?"
Miranda
responded, "it depends on what is normal for you." everybody has
his/her own opinion/measurement what is normal, for sure; or how many times
someone has sex in a day / a week / a month; or how long someone can stand not
having it.
To entertain
herself, Miranda rented some videos at Blockbuster to watch. Coincidentally,
somewhere near Blockbuster, there were some guys working on the street
catcalled Miranda. They seemed to know that Miranda was entertaining herself in
order not to think about sex all the time. However, when Miranda responded to
those man, they retreated. One of them, "Relax, lady. I am married." This made Miranda mock them 😁
Samantha --
who seemed to avoid having one steady partner to have sex -- was trying to
seduce Siddharta, her yoga instructor. Unfortunately, instead of following
Samantha's sexual need, Siddharta even taught her how to control her libido.
Siddharta claimed that he used to be fond of sex too until he thought that his
need of sex was a problem (he said it was all just ego.) so he started
practicing celibacy. Interestingly, Samantha was interested in practicing it,
though it was hard. (Can we interpret it that to some extent, Samantha agrred with Siddharta that having high sexual drive is sometimes troublesome?)
After a few
days, Samantha eventually could not control herself. She invited one man in her
yoga class to have sex. She did it in front of Siddharta. When seeing Samantha
and that man left his yoga class, Siddharta was dumbfounded, his face was
sweating.
Charlotte
got a new boyfriend in this episode. Without her knowing, Kevin used to go out
with Carrie. Carrie dumped him because he was a sex maniac. Nevertheless, with
Charlotte, Kevin was a different person. He was no longer sex maniac. Realizing
that his sexual drive put him in trouble, Kevin consumed prozac. He thought in
a relationship, sex was not important, more important was how a man treated his
woman with kindness. Unfortunately, this even made Charlotte decide to dump him.
See? Women also need sex in a relationship.
*******
When
watching this episode for the first time several years ago, innocently I
thought it would only happen in western countries, lol. However, recently, a
good friend of mine once in a while tells me about her coach in the fitness
center where she is a member. This coach is really addicted to sex.
Interestingly, instead of having one steady sex partner, just like Samantha,
she likes doing it with someone whom she happens to meet somewhere, for example
when going traveling to Bali, let's say. Or sometimes she looks for dates online. Sounds very westernized, doesn't it? 🤪 or am I just outdated now? 🫢😑🤪
It reminded
me of my discussion with some students of mine long time ago. Some male
students said that no matter how much they needed sex, they were scared of
sexually transmitted diseases. This stopped them from being promiscuous.
MS48 14.09
13 August 2025
